Sunday, January 4, 2015

Say 'Hello' to a brand new day!

One of the things that I love about January 1st, is that it seems to be a chance to start fresh.  To say, "OK, this is where I was, this is where I'm at, this is where I want to be."

Year End Reflection by Running Hutch
So, while perusing Pinterest, I came across this really cool template that I thought I would share.  It took longer than I had anticipated and was not nearly as easy as I had expected!  These aren't in any particular order, just what happened to cross my mind.

10 Highlights:

  1. Mom - It may seem odd that Mom's passing would be on the highlight list; one of the last conversations that we had, she talked about how she felt trapped and helpless.  Now she isn't.  I like to imagine her soul at peace and if there is a heaven she is riding her horse around the streets of gold.
  2. Student Success - While I can't share details, I had 2 students that were extraordinarily successful last school year.
  3. Xmas Party - The first adult party that I have hosted, it was a pretty good success.  A good time was had by all, I think.
  4. Charlie's Graduation - I am combining his graduation with his 18th birthday.  It is almost an indescribable feeling of pride, love, hope, and so many more emotions, while at the same time surreal.  It doesn't seem like it's been 18 years.
  5. Married - Viva Las Vegas, Baby!! What a fantastic week it was!  On April 1st, I did what I had sworn never to do again and I'm loving every minute of it!
  6. 42nd b-day - Those who have read The Hitchhikers Guide To the Galaxy will understand the significance of the number.  For those who don't, in that book, 42 is the answer to everything.  So for this year only, I have been the answer, whenever the kids don't know, they just say, "Mom is the answer!" While that has been fun, I put my b-day as a highlight because my party was small and fun and planned for me! Then, the night ended with my honey and I in the hot tub under a softly falling snow - big flakes, REALLY big flakes. It was perfect.
  7. Teaching Art - This fall I have been volunteering in Jaidyn's classroom as an Art Heritage Instructor.  It is great to have interaction with the students and be teaching again.
  8. Award Winning Tori - Tori is involved in many activities in which she is outstanding and contributed to the group in so many ways.  However, one area that spotlights her is her pianist ability.  When she competes, she wins.  She is amazing.
  9. Xmas Presents - I handmade the majority of Christmas presents that were given this year.  On top of that, they were individualized.  I gave with love.
  10. Acceptance - There were many self realizations this year, but the most significant was realizing that my dream/vision of teaching was not reality and that reality sucked!  It takes a special person to be a teacher - connecting with students and inspiring them to be their greatest in a world that constantly drags them down. That I can do; I can build a relationship with a student, inspire them, build them up, teach them to be and do and think.  Unfortunately, that is only 15% of the job.  The rest of 'teaching' is paperwork, parents, administration, cohorts, meetings, agendas, duties, lesson planning, and, so much more.  I have never been organized.  I have never been a planner. My favorite excuse is that I work best under pressure.  These qualities don't fit the requirements needed for 'teaching'.  When I was able to accept that my vision and the reality would never coexist, I was able to let go of that ideal and with that, I was able to let go of the disappointment, anger, and guilt of which I had been holding. It was an amazing release.
10 5 Disappointments:   (I thought for many hours but my year really didn't have that many downs.)
  1. We were not able to attend the State Marching Band tournament.
  2. We were not able to attend the All-State Choir Concert.
  3. I didn't get my paperwork turned in in time to renew my CO license.  To be honest, I didn't know if I even wanted to renew it when it came time.
  4. My teaching contract was not renewed at the end of the school year.
  5. Even though I am making attempts, I can't seem to find a routine that keeps our family organized, our chores done, and chaos out of our sanctuary.
3 Game Changers:
  1. Losing my contract and not securing another teaching position 
  2. Loss of Income but with the same output
  3. Adjusting our schedules to fit with the night audit position
3 Things I focused On:
  1. Stepping back into the role of Mom - By that I mean reading with the kids every night, making super cool treats to take to classroom parties, helping more one on one with homework, playing more games, and spending quality time together. It's a work in progress.
  2. Being a better employee - my last position suffered because of my lack of organization, I am trying to be better organized at work with the steps I take to complete my work
  3. Organization - This is a work in progress and I didn't make nearly as much progress as I had hoped!
3 Things I forgot:  I'm sure that by this the template meant tasks or projects; I took it a different way.
  1. To be a wife - The last half of the year has been overly stressful because of the circumstances we are facing.  Our focus has been on survival - day by day survival. At times it has felt like I am living with my best friend instead of my husband.  We have kind of lost touch a bit in the romance department. It's ok, though; I have a plan!
  2. To have fun - When we first met, our family spent a lot of time playing music together, hanging out with friends, being outside our home and socializing with other people.  Recently, we have become hermit-like in our struggle to survive.
  3. To step outside my bubble - I have been so focused on trying to fix what's going on in my home and in my bubble, that I have failed in checking in with those in my outer bubble.  I have said, "Yes, lets get together!" and then never made a date.  I've said, "I'll call you later!" - 3 months ago. I realize that true friends are able to pick up the phone and pick up where they left off and we do, but in the meantime there is much that is left unshared. 
Reflection and plans for next year:

Over the past year, the obstacles and challenges have been few, but they have been momentous and daunting.  I am stronger for having been challenged by them.  I would like to say that I have overcome them all, however, that would be a big, fat lie.  I am working toward it.  I don't put much faith in resolutions, but I think having a vision of where you want your life to go during the year requires planning.

Check back soon to see my plan for the year 2015 - it is going to be an amazing journey!
Here

No comments:

Post a Comment